I’m so envious of all the normal happy people out there... Why can’t we all just wake up, be happy and live?? Why must some of us have to rely on pills to level us out?? It maddens me… Well not so much maddens me then makes me jealous haha! I look around and see numerous people without a care in the world, especially my friends. I envy them to be honest... Deep down inside I want to be care free and not worry about anything. I just wish sometimes they cared enough about me, it seems lately they just don't want to bother. I enjoy being there for them when the going gets tough, I want them to open and talk to me... but it would be nice if they cared enough to ask me how I'm doing, and not always talk about them. They never seem to want to hear about my problems, fears, dreams etc., it's always about themselves. I'm always last in line because I have a child and can't go out and party and have "fun". Not many of my friends and family understand where I’m coming from, it’s such a relief to find people on this site just like me. It makes me feel better about myself and not so crazy. I hope all my blogger friends feel the same way, isn’t it a relief to know you aren’t alone? I think so! I’d like to thank everyone who has stopped by my blog, read and left a comments. It truly means a lot to me. I’m really enjoying blogging, I hope I keep it up. I normally don’t stick to anything, but I can see myself sticking to this!
Monday, September 22, 2008
Green Eyed Monster
I’m so envious of all the normal happy people out there... Why can’t we all just wake up, be happy and live?? Why must some of us have to rely on pills to level us out?? It maddens me… Well not so much maddens me then makes me jealous haha! I look around and see numerous people without a care in the world, especially my friends. I envy them to be honest... Deep down inside I want to be care free and not worry about anything. I just wish sometimes they cared enough about me, it seems lately they just don't want to bother. I enjoy being there for them when the going gets tough, I want them to open and talk to me... but it would be nice if they cared enough to ask me how I'm doing, and not always talk about them. They never seem to want to hear about my problems, fears, dreams etc., it's always about themselves. I'm always last in line because I have a child and can't go out and party and have "fun". Not many of my friends and family understand where I’m coming from, it’s such a relief to find people on this site just like me. It makes me feel better about myself and not so crazy. I hope all my blogger friends feel the same way, isn’t it a relief to know you aren’t alone? I think so! I’d like to thank everyone who has stopped by my blog, read and left a comments. It truly means a lot to me. I’m really enjoying blogging, I hope I keep it up. I normally don’t stick to anything, but I can see myself sticking to this!
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4 comments:
I felt just like you when I started. People I could finally relate to were here. I felt like the crazy one among my friends too. "too emotional." stuff like that. The meds do help though. despite all my rants. lol. I think you'll like staying around here. it's worth it. it gets fun, you get to know each other and it becomes a community.
I had been trying for years to heal from child abuse in "isolation". My friends had not experienced abuse and did not depend on medications to keep them stable and so I didn't talk about my abuse, medications etc. much outside of therapy. Then, I began blogging and the whole world opened up. I found people who understood. People who supported me and cared what I had been through. I found a level of acceptance that I had never experienced before. My healing proceeded so much more quickly after that. Writing my feelings and sharing them more publicly was an important part of that healing. Just not holding stuff inside as I had done my entire life.
This is a wonderful place. Blogging has so many more benefits than I ever could have guessed. So, stick with this. Get to know this wonderful group of people. You will be so glad you did. And, you have things to share that we can all learn from. It is wonderful the way the give and take works.
Take care,
Tamara
Blogging is addictive. Probably because of the people. I'm glad to meet you and hope you'll stay!
You are so right about other people being carefree. I know I need to get out of the house so the walls don't close in on me but when in public, it just confuses me to see people so happy. I see people even in bad situations that are happy (or at least act happy) and I don't understand it. You are not alone!
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